I am the first to admit, I dont have a lot of friends. Especially female friends. But I can say that the friends that I do have, I am there for them no matter what. I will stick by through thick and thin with them. I will even get burned and still be there after my healing.

Scorpio thing? I dont know. Some say so...

So here is the latest. A few months ago I got a call from a friend of mine that I went to High School with. We hadnt seen eachother for about 10 years and we swore that we were going to get together soon. It finally happened a few weeks ago. She came to my house and we had a blast! I had missed her and it was so fun to chat up on old times.
Unfortunately, she is going through a nasty divorce and custy battle. She is currently living without her daughter at her parents house. She has a part time job and is struggling to find another because she has been a housewife since school. She has no work experience.
Honestly, I dont remember her even graduating High School. If I remember right, she didnt bother because she was getting married.
Anyways, I heard about her situation. It was ugly. She told me everything that night.
I didnt hear from her for a couple weeks until she called me one night, crying and saying that she just got into an arguement with her soon to be ex about her daughter. She asked me if I could go get her and if she could stay at my house for the night. I agreed and went and got her. Needless to say, she was a mess. She was upset over her daughter and conversation with her ex, she was fighting with her mother, and she was in the middle of a big arguement with her now-boyfriend. I got a bed made for her, I talked to her boyfriend and told him to just meet us at my house in the morning and we would go to breakfast, she finally fell asleep so I went to bed.
We had breakfast the next day and again, I didnt hear from her all week. Then I get a call from a mutual friend. He told me of all this bad mouthing she had been doing about me. She said some pretty mean things but a lot of what he told me was childish high school rumor shit.
Nice huh?
She called me a few days later and when I asked her about it, she denied it (of course). I was not rude to her. I just told her that I didnt need that kinda crap and she told me that she would get it straightened out.
So, whatever. Havent heard from her since. I think she needs to get some of her own life straightened out.

Speaking of friends, I would like to say that I am very happy for a good friend of mine that has found him, from the way it sounded, a very nice and down to earth girl. She has to be cute (and thin) because this friend of mine is pretty picky that way  ;-)  Its going to be so good to see him take all of his trips with a new companion, to see him diving with a new "buddy" and to have someone to share his life experiences with. I know that it is something that he has been searching and longing for for a while. I honestly wish them all the best. He deserves to be happy. So if you are reading this... I love ya (brat) and Im very happy for ya!  

 

 I love my gramps. He is the funniest, sweetest man.
You have to understand my grandparents to understand this blog entry.
Grandma is a worry wart. If she hasnt got something to worry about, she will make something up. Grandma is a drama queen. Her stories are always a little more dramatic than what really happened. And mostly, my grandma LOVES to nag at my grandpa. Always nagging and complaining to him about something or the other. So, naturally, my grandpa has learned to tune her out. He can sit there and do whatever he is doing and not hear one word that is coming out of her mouth. It is the funniest thing.

OK, so I am sitting at my grandparents house, eating cake and ice cream, celebrating grandmas birthday. Grandpa and I are back in the corner of the kitchen sitting quietly, listening and watching grandma open her presents. My grandpa then leans in and quietly says...

"Ya know Steffy (thats what he calls me), I didnt get your grandma a gift for her birthday this year."

Totally suprised, I turned and asked him why not.

He leaned in again and quietly says "Well, cause she never used the one I got her last year."

I sat there for a second, trying to remember what it was that he got her last year. I could not, for the life of me, remember so I leaned over and said, "I cant remember. What did you get her last year."

He leaned in, serious look on his face, and said, "Her burial plot"

Yup, he got me again.

True story.

Im in bad shape tonight emotionally. BAD BAD SHAPE!
The header of this blog is my life...FOR EVERY WALL I BREAK DOWN, TWO MORE APPEAR.
When will it end?
I know that Im going to be told that it will end when I make it end, when I change what i am doing but F**K!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
The sickest part is, I was feeling so bad for so long about being heartless. The second that I let that little bit of wall down...I was slammed!
New wall now.
Thicker than ever.

Old habits are looking pretty comforting right now...

This is the post that I was working on a week ago when my internet crashed. Bear with me...

I woke up Saturday morning with this dull cough and this piercing throb in my chest. I tried to continue with my day, but by saturday evening, it had gotten so bad that it pretty much took over the rest of my weekend. I was couch bound.
That is, until last night....(week ago sunday)
It was about 10:00 and I had just taken my NyQuil. I walked into the kitchen and caught a glimpse of my horse out of the corner of my eye. She was pacing back and forth along the fence. Then all the sudden she dropped to the ground and started to roll, almost like there was something that was hanging onto her and she was trying to roll to get it off. Two things were going through my mind as I grabbed my coat, my flashlight and ran out the door...something was attacking her or she had Colic. Honestly, I was leaning towards her being attacked by something. Colic scares the crap out of me. My moms mare died of it a few years back and it is a disease that puts the horse in so much pain, you have to put them down. 
I got outside to her and tried to calm her down. There was nothing attacking her. It was what I dreaded. She had all the signs. I ran into the house and got my cell phone. I called the vet and she was only a few blocks away on another emergency. She said it sounds like Colic to her as well. She told me to try to keep her on her feet. By the time I got back outside and made it around the fence, she was lying down and I could not get her up. She continued to roll on her back, as if she had an itch that was just killing her to itch...which in fact, its not an itch, its pain.
I finally got her to her feet about the same time that the vet got there. She gave her a steroid shot and a muscle relaxer. She told me to keep an eye on her and if she starts to paw again, then I needed to walk her. If walking didnt work, then to call her and she would come back out.
So, here it is, 11:00 at night, I am sick and I have to stay awake and watch her. After about the third time I had gotten up from the couch to go to the kitchen window to check her, I was irritated. So, I grabbed my blanket, crawled up on the counter, sat my sick and coughing a** in the one side of the kitchen sink and my feet in the other side. I propped the blanket up against the wall and rested my head against it. And that is where I spent the remainder of the night when I wasnt outside walking her. I had to go out at 12:30, 2:00 and again at 4:00. Oh yeah...of course it was snowing that night...
What I do for my damned animals...

 

I havent had internet for the past week.

I have a lot to blog...

I will be up again.

Miss you all 

Had a bit of a fit today.

Boss wants to hire this sales rep. He brought her in today. I aint likeing it.

So whats the problem?

Two words...Shes Female.

The fact that I am the only female at my work has been a major plus for me. I do not have many female friends. Even (as a friend of mine pointed out) with this blog. I think that I have ONE female reader, Kyra.

It has always been this way with me. I just get along better with males. I dont like the back stabbing and the drama that comes along with females. Especially when its in a work environment. When there are too many women in one work area, it is everyone for themselves. Theres no mercy. And as far as I am concerned, more than one female (that be me) working for this company is too many.

So, I had my tantrum, I now have a headache and my boss took off and left the office while I was at lunch so I cant get any more info about it until he comes back.

The worst part? Shes a damn prissy. What is going to happen when all this snow melts and turns the jobsites to mud? I cannot picture her going to jobsites as it is but what happens when she (God forbid) has to get out of her Volvo, step in mud and get her little feetsy weetsy wet and muddy? As far as I am concerned, the chick needs to look into selling Avon, not construction. Shed fit in much better.

There, I feel better now....